We commend your reasons for becoming a surrogate, for truly, there is little as selfless, as full of compassion and empathy as the act of becoming a surrogate. In addition to being a life-altering decision, it is not an easy concept for everyone to accept, especially the children.
Children can have varying reactions to the prospect of surrogacy, and who can blame them if they wonder why their mom is not going to bring their new sibling home. But the fact is, it is important for the kids to understand from the start that the baby in their mother’s womb is but a guest for nine months and never theirs to begin with.
Many surrogacy agencies in Texas, such as Shared conception, will assist this selfless woman if she has made this decision with her family’s blessing. Conception through surrogacy may make anyone uncomfortable and can be exceptionally overwhelming due to the legal, medical, emotional, and social complexities.
Process of Surrogate Pregnancy- How to explain it to Your Kids
The sooner you start discussing surrogacy with your children, the more accepting they will become of it. But we recommend broaching the subject very tactfully and injecting as much positivity as you can muster into your tone when discussing it.
You could start with book resources and practice family-building methods for the subject. Here is a list of some ideas for introducing the process of surrogate pregnancy to your children.
1. Book Resources
Fill your home and especially your children’s library with many books on surrogacy. Make sure they’re all kid-friendly and, most importantly, easy enough to understand at their level. Books are wonderful, and you could make reading those a family session. Adopting family-building approaches toward surrogacy will be a more comprehensive solution to cultivating the entire family’s minds to accept it wholeheartedly.
There are a host of books with wonderful imagery on surrogacy that you must choose. These book resources help normalize surrogacy and explain to the children how having a baby is the best thing to happen. But many families cannot conceive naturally, and it is a great service to make their dream come true.
2. Introduce Your Children to the Intended Parents
The most important aspect is to ensure that your children feel completely involved in your decision of surrogacy. You must make sure they’re with you every step of the way, including the times you meet the intended parents.
In fact, it would be a great idea to have the intended parents bond with your children and, if possible, arrange to take your children to their home. This way, your kids will get a chance to bond with the family where the surrogate baby will go and understand why there’s a need for a baby to be there.
Telling the story of the intended parents and sharing all the reasons why they feel desolate without a child of their own will strike compassionate chords in your kids. They’ll become more understanding and supportive when they understand the plight of others.
3. Make Surrogacy a Concept for Activities
You could engage children in a range of creative activities, like drawing and painting on surrogacy. You could make your children imagine happy scenes of the time when the new baby will be in the home of the intended parents.
Make them imagine the joy of the intended parents of feeling complete, just as you and your partner did when your kids were born. Make them draw pictures of it, and use colors and imagination. You could even ask your children to prepare a special storybook for the surrogate-born baby and gift it to the intended parents.
You could have them take pictures to paste into the storybook of your own family so that the intended parents show it to the child when he/she grows up someday.
4. Go Shopping for a Gift
Children will be more accepting of the fact that the baby is a gift from them to the intended parents. You could make them come to acknowledge this with a few tactics. For instance, take the children shopping for a gift for the newborn baby. Tell them that the baby and the present will be a gift from your family to the intended parents during this momentous event in their lives.
You could let them choose an outfit for the newborn, perhaps a blanket or something as thoughtful. The activity is sure to please the little ones and also make them feel proud for being a source of happiness for others.
5. Arm Your Children with Knowledge
One reason why your kids might be apprehensive about the process of surrogate pregnancy is because of the taunts and probing questions from society. Hence, it is best to shield your children by arming them with education and knowledge.
Talk to them in fine detail about the reasons to become a surrogate, the goodness in it, as well as the entire process of surrogate pregnancy. Arm your children with the knowledge they can use to respond to people’s comments and questions.
Final Thoughts
The process of surrogate pregnancy is still a taboo subject in many states. For this purpose, many surrogate women feel hesitant to broach the subject with their children, despite their fine reasons for being a surrogate.
When you take this decision, it is important and good practice to discuss the subject, your decision, and the process with the children. You must involve them in the process because it is a right to be a part of something that will affect your entire family.
Educating the children with the right information will also make them open-minded and more compassionate and empathetic individuals. For further assistance with your surrogacy journey, reach out to us. Shared Conception is happy to assist in any art of your journey!
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