As first-time intended parents just starting your surrogacy journey, you may be curious about the best ways to foster communication between you and your surrogate. There are many forms of communication that you can choose from. It’s essential to have an open discussion with your surrogate to discuss items such as the preferred type of communication, the frequency of communication, and any other matters related to keeping one another informed.

Specify Your Desired Level of Communication

Prior to selecting a surrogate, it’s essential to determine how frequently you wish to communicate with them. This information will be communicated to the surrogate so they can agree or set their own boundaries. Some individuals may only seek communication around the time of appointments, though they will still receive updates from their caseworkers. Hearing information directly from the surrogate can provide a sense of reassurance for them.

On the other hand, some people desire more regular updates directly from the surrogate. The amount of communication ultimately depends on the comfort levels and preferences of everyone involved.

Maintain a Positive Communication Approach

Consider the tone and manner of communication during your conversations. Strive to keep your exchanges positive and constructive. Avoid engaging in angry or sad conversations, especially when dealing with sensitive issues – let the agency and caseworkers handle more intense discussions. While it’s crucial to share necessary information, particularly from the agency, try to convey it in a manner that encourages a positive and supportive environment.

Be Clear and Concise in Your Communication

During this challenging period, clarity is of utmost importance in your communications. It might be beneficial to outline a list of topics you wish to cover before composing an email or engaging in a phone conversation. This approach can help streamline discussions, minimizing the need for multiple calls.

Be Mindful of the Surrogate’s personal Responsibilities

Surrogates have their own spouses, children, work, family obligations, etc., so be respectful of their time and give them grace if you don’t hear back from a call, email, or text right away. Just know that you and the baby are always on their mind and important to them.

If you are interested in surrogacy or have any questions, please don’t hesitate to contact us at Shared Conception. You can visit our website at or call us at 713-622-1144.